Changing old patterns
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” — Carl Jung When thinking about the shadow self, I always think back to an argument I was having with my eldest daughter a few years ago, when she was a teenager. I remember she snapped something …
The primary goal of a human infant is to maintain proximity to its caregiver, which was necessary for survival during our evolution. Babies can’t survive alone. They depend on their main caregiver (attachment figure) to literally keep them alive. Founded by psychoanalyst John Bowlby in the 1950s and expanded by Mary Ainsworth, attachment theory outlines …
WHAT IS THE MOTHER WOUND? The bond between a mother and her child is so strong that British psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott believed that there’s no such thing as an infant, but only an infant and their mother. He believed that a child’s sense of self is built by the kind of a relationship that they have with …
Self-regulation is how we cope with certain emotional behaviours and physical movements during stressful situations. Self-regulation is the skill that helps individuals stay focused and attentive during times of stress. Our ability to self-regulate as an adult has roots in our childhoods. Learning how to self-regulate is an important skill that children learn both for …
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When I first learnt about the ‘Wounded Healer’ theory, it made complete sense to me. Having been through a mental breakdown myself, and hitting rock bottom, I remembered coming through the other side and just having complete compassion and empathy for everyone, and wanting to go help as many people as I could. The wounded …
Imagine this. You are waiting outside the shopping centre for a friend or family member to pick you up, but they don’t arrive. Minutes turn into an hour, and you have no mobile phone. How would you be feeling? Slightly anxious? Worried about your friend/relative? Wondering whether to leave and find another way home, …
Do you understand the difference between emotional intelligence and emotional maturity? In a nutshell, emotional intelligence refers to the understanding of emotions, while emotional maturity is the act of applying that knowledge. Emotionally intelligent people understand how to handle tough situations without unnecessarily escalating them. Emotional maturity focuses on our emotional history, beginning with …
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A Johari window, created by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingham in 1955, is a psychological tool used for self-awareness, personal development, improving communications and interpersonal relationships. The model provides a simple visual reference for examining your personality, and for improving understanding between individuals. The Open Area represents the things that you know about yourself and that others know …
On Friday afternoon, I was taking a shift for a mental health charity I regularly volunteer for. Many of the service users are children who are suffering abuse at the hands of adults, and Friday was no exception. When I had finished the shift, I had a phone call from the PE teacher at the …
Emotional maturity is the ability to recognise, express, and control one’s own emotions while being able to empathise and respond to the emotions of others. It sounds simple, but many people can only see from their own ‘frame of reference’. They haven’t learnt to take a pause, and consider what is going on for others. …